J04

I've always been the crafty type, even when I was young and didn't understand you could do more with yarn and a crochet hook than just make a reallyreallyreally long chain. (I made so many for my mom that she eventually had to give them to other family members, lest they take over our tiny trailer.) Now that I have excess time in between tossing job applications out, I've been taking the opportunity to get more familiar with embroidery.

Technically, I've been embroidering for about 15 years now. I saw that I could use cross stitch to replicate pixel art and fell in love.

The oldest photo of a cross-stitch project I have on hand. I really need to finish the series of these I was doing...

I only really started more traditional embroidery a couple years ago, when I saw other people recreating manga panels with thread and fabric. I was reading Witch Hat Atelier at the time, and I thought "This is gorgeous. I want to be able to do something like that." Thus, making an homage to the manga became my goal.

I haven't reached that goal yet, but I've found a lot of joy in the texture inherent to embroidery—much more than I expected. My latest completed project especially has so much variety to it that even running my fingers over the finished product makes me happy.

I've also learned that the craft is really forgiving. Looking at it, I can see where I could improve—but I also clearly see that it's beautiful. The colours and shapes (and, of course, the person who designed the pattern) take most of the work away from me. All I have to do is follow the lines and I get something gorgeous.

It's also exceedingly calming. Despite admittedly stabbing myself multiple times while finishing the project above, I never felt frustrated or annoyed the same way I can sometimes with crochet; I never felt intimidated like I do with sewing. I could turn on a TV show, get my hoop ready, and just go with the flow.

And there's something so satisfying about building out the textures. Start with the stems and leaves to create the foundation, then the satin stitch flowers. Move on to the roses (those are my favourite to do), and finish off with the French knots. I didn't even mind working with the metallic thread this time—though I did combine it with some regular floss to make it easier to manage.

Being unemployed is tough on me. I put a lot of weight on myself to maintain the household, when I know I'm lucky enough to benefit from a good safety net.

But being unemployed also gives me the time to get back in touch with the things I love; to de-stress, to make things. As someone who hadn't really finished any creative projects in years before this (though I started many!), it's been great to get back in touch with what I really love to do. Hopefully when I have a job again, I'll be able to keep it up, because it really does make me happy.